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5 Reasons to Love Rude Greeting Cards Loaded With Banter

Posted by P. Ottymouth on

    You might be thinking of getting a rude greeting card for a good friend of yours. After all, banter cards have an appeal that separates them from the generic rubbish you find in department stores. However, you may also be worried about how your friend will receive your card. Sure, the two of you have history together, but you’re still not 100% sure that this rude greeting card won’t overstep any lines.

    Why not take the risk and get that banter card for your chum anyway? If they’re thrilled with getting a rude greeting card, great. If they’re pissed instead, you’ll need to know how to defend yourself and convince them of your good taste. Here are 5 reasons your friends should take it from you and love rude greeting cards filled with banter.

    5 Reasons to Go for Rude Greeting Cards Full of Banter

    1. Rude Banter Cards are Unique

    Perhaps one reason why other greeting cards receive a lot of flak is because the messages inside are incredibly generic. Seriously, you could probably buy a card with the same message if you walked into a department store on the other side of the Atlantic.

    This is far from the case with banter cards, however. Take one of Cardshit’s rude greeting cards for instance:

    May you live long and never smell of piss.” Do you honestly think you’ll find such wonderfully rude cards on just any department store shelf? If you’re still settling for run-of-the-mill birthday cards while your friends have started doling out banter cards in sunset orange envelopes, you’d better step up your game, chum.

    2. Rude Jokes are Timeless

    And by timeless, we mean that they’ve been a comedy staple for centuries. Shakespeare, for one, peppered his plays with rude jokes, including what could be one of the earliest “your mom” jokes in literature.

    Rude jokes go much farther back than that, though. Mankind’s oldest joke appears to be a fart joke written on an ancient Sumerian clay tablet. This makes sending rude cards tantamount to continuing a long-standing cross-cultural tradition. Tell that to the next person who disses your fondness for rude greeting cards. 

    3. Laughter is Healthy

    Whenever you laugh, your heartbeat and breathing both speed up as if you were exercising. Laugh for 10 to 15 minutes and you can burn up to 50 calories. Plus, laughter releases endorphins and human growth hormones, which lift your mood and boost your immune system respectively. You’re basically doing your friends and family a favor whenever you make them laugh.

    Now, offensive jokes and rude cards are classic ways of getting at least a snicker out of your companions. Time them right--hand a birthday celebrant a “Happy Birthday Nobhead” card--and you’ll probably have your friends gasping for air. Then, take a step back and pat yourself on the back. By spending just £3.00 on one of Cardshit’s banter cards, you’ve played a role in helping your friends live slightly healthier lives. What a hero.

    4. Banter Is Fun

    Whether you’re with a close friend or stuck next to a good-natured stranger on a crowded tram, a bit of banter will leave you both grinning afterwards. If people are eavesdropping on your exchange, there’s a huge chance you’ll make their day too. Great fun for everyone!

    Now, imagine using rude cards to share the fun with a good friend on the other side of the country. Who ever said that banter can’t be long-distance, anyway? If you’re lucky, your friend will take the cue and fire banter cards from Cardshit right back at you. 

    5. Banter is Good For Relationships

    As cheesy as it sounds, it’s true. Friends who shoot rude one-liners and bits of banter at each other tend to have the strongest bonds. So, if you know someone who exchanges rude cards with you on a regular basis, hold onto them with all you have.

    Rude cards are the way to go, full stop. And when it comes to rude greeting cards, our selection at Cardshit is an absolute treasure trove, just saying...

    Liked this article? Check out our blog for more posts about rude greeting cards.

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