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12 Funny Valentine's Day Gifts for a Hearty Laugh

Posted by P. Ottymouth on

In case the lovey-dovey TV ads and increasingly expensive roses haven’t made it obvious, Valentine’s Day is almost here. You might have grown sick of burning your cash on pricey bouquets and other overdone presents, however. Why not buy your loved one a humorous gift for a change? To get you started, here are 12 funny Valentine’s Day gifts ranging from puntastic to rude and cheeky.

12 Unconventional and Funny Valentine’s Day Gifts for Your Beloved

1. Giant Inflatable Heart

Some people prefer small, pocket-sized gifts for understated romance. This is not one of those gifts. Prepare to carry your loved one’s bag while they lug this XXL heart around.

TIP: Use it as a beach ball for a funny Valentine’s Day date by the sea!

2. Squishy Plush Heart

Is a giant inflatable heart still too corny for you? This plush human heart should do the trick!

Not a fan of heart-themed gifts in general? Go for plush bladders, livers, or colons instead.

3. “I Hope Your Day is as Nice as Your Butt” Keychain

This rude but funny Valentine’s Day gift will have your loved one blushing whenever they grab their keys.

4. “I Have A Hole Lot of Love For You” Card

Sneak in a romantic butt pun with the help of a cute orange cat and a heart-shaped balloon. This Valentine’s Day card from Cardshit is great on its own or paired with any of gifts on this list, especially the keychain.

5. Grow-Your-Own-Prosecco Kit

For the Valentine who loves wine as much as they love you! With this present, they can flex their green thumbs and grow choice grapes right at home. That, or they’ll end up with a fresh addition to the backyard compost bin if their vines dry up and die in the end.

6. Wine Sippers

Get in on the boozy Valentine’s Day fun with these wine sippers, which come in pairs! Funny, classy, and perfect for a stay-home date. We just hope you’re smart enough to keep these out of the dishwasher.

7. Fifty Shades of Bacon

Sorry, chums, nothing erotic here. This tongue-in-cheek Valentine’s Day present features fifty savory dishes, making it perfect for absolute foodies. You’ll want to bookmark the bacon ice cream recipe!

8. Spoof Newspaper

How would the love of your life react to seeing themselves on the front page of the dailies? Present them with this funny faux newspaper on Valentine’s Day to find out.

TIP: Furnish magazine racks, neighbors’ doorsteps, and the nearest newspaper stand with copies for a one-of-a-kind prank.

9. “Haynes Explains Marriage” Book

If Haynes manuals can explain the inner workings of cars and motorbikes, they can certainly guide you through married life! This customized present includes tips on “pillow torque” and “routine maintenance.”

DID YOU KNOW? The Haynes Publishing Company came out with an actual manual about babies in 2003, around the time when founder John Haynes became a new father himself.

10. Perfect Chocolates for the Not-Exactly-Perfect Lover

Let’s face it, the love of your life comes with warts and farts. Assure them that they’re not too shabby with a set of these Belgian chocolates, printed with funny messages that celebrate how wonderfully mediocre your lover is.

11. “You’re Better Than My Ex” Album

The cover says it all. Try filling the pages with funny pictures from your high school days or your drunk nights together. Then, buy the obnoxious chocolates above to top off your rude Valentine’s Day gift.

12. “Making Valentine’s Day Great Again” Card

Be naughty. Be offensive. Be prepared to wipe up your loved one’s vomit once they lay their eyes on the POTUS in neon pink underpants. Get this card exclusively from Cardshit.

Take your pick from these 12 unconventional and funny gifts this Valentine’s Day. Just be sure to choose a present with the right brand of humor for your beloved, otherwise you might end up single by February 15!

Need more ideas for cheeky gifts and rude cards? Check out our blog for more awesome posts.

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